Get ready for the deepest conversations in the universe. Buy Now for $19.99

Mindcrushers Box with Baby Art

Holy shit, you found my website!

I am so happy you’re here. Let me tell you about Mindcrushers. It is a deck of cards. You pick a card, and you have a conversation about what’s on the card. The cards are pretty weird and stupid.

  • 200 bizarre conversation starters
  • Co-written by two creators of Cards Against Humanity
  • Big colorful cards with funny people and animals on them
  • Talk about nonsense while civilization crumbles around you
  • Play it like a game with points, or just be chill and talk
  • WARNING: Contains hilarious sexual content

So, what do you think? Did I do a good job? Will you give me your money?

Questions You Might Have

What the fuck is going on with this website?

I don’t appreciate your tone.

Sorry, what is this website?

This is the website for the product Mindcrushers, available now for the cool, cool price of $19.99.

Right, but what is Mindcrushers?

Mindcrushers is a cool, cool deck of 200 cards with cool, cool words on them.

What do the words say?

The words say questions, and then you have a conversation about the questions, and then you decide who won that conversation.

So, Mindcrushers is a game?

Kind of. It’s more like a deck of funny conversation starters you can play as a game if you want to. It’s pretty low-key.

Who wrote the words?

Two of the guys who created Cards Against Humanity wrote the words, along with a few other people.

What other people?

You wouldn’t know them.

Do the cards have bad words on them?

Yes. Mindcrushers is for people 17 and up.

But what if I want to play with people under 17?

Remove all the cards that say “NSFW”on them and Mindcrushers is okay for people 13 and up.

How many people do I need to play Mindcrushers?

At least two or three people. But probably not a million. That would be ridiculous.

So, why the name Mindcrushers?

Well, the cards are supposed to crush your mind, metaphorically speaking. But really it’s just kind of a cool name, and nobody owned the trademark, so here we are.

When and where would I play Mindcrushers?

Mindcrushers is great for events such as: boring Zoom calls, late-night parties, road trips, work bullshit, weed smoking sessions, pagan sacrifices, initiation rites, first dates, first kills, blood orgies, with your family, before or after playing America’s #1 party game Cards Against Humanity®, etc.

Where shouldn’t I play Mindcrushers?

Church gatherings, children’s birthday parties, Jeff Bezos’ house, underwater, inside of a whale, while operating heavy machinery, at any Trump-branded property, etc.

Am I a bad person if I don’t buy Mindcrushers for $19.99?

Yes, you would be pretty bad.

Why am I still reading this FAQ?

Because I love you.

What?

❤️ Buy Mindcrushers

Hey, listen. I’m working on new Mindcrushers stuff.

Give me your info and I’ll tell you when it’s ready. I promise not to send you stupid bullshit.

Questions You Might Not Have But That I Would Like to Address Anyway

Do I have free will?

No. You don’t magically exist outside the laws of physics and causality.

Is morality just a social construction?

Yeah, but it’s still cool and useful.

Is God real?

Come on.

So, what’s the best meat at Chipotle?

It’s the barbacoa. And you might not know this, but it’s even better if you add the fajita veggies.

Don’t I have to pay for that?

No, Chipotle will put on the fajita veggies for free. It’s a loophole.

But is it immoral to eat meat?

Oh, absolutely.

Wait, didn’t you just say that morality is a social construction?

I have to go now. I’m needed in another FAQ.

Come on, just one more. Please?

Fine, one more.

Is death the end?

If you accept that linear time is an illusion and that we live in an infinite multiverse, then death as we define it does not exist and cannot be the end.

Are you high?

🍁 Buy Mindcrushers for $19.99